I can tuck mytits in my pants
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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