i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
