just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
People in love make me want to vomit
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize