it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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