She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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