we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
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Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
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Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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