My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
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