hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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