So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
