He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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