I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
