Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
You brought string cheese to the strip club
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize