just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
