What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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