porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize