Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
