Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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