omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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