Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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