we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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