i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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