what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
