I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
