i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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