i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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