My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
tonight lets celebrate not being married
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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