Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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