the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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