she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
