I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
