I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
