oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
