Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
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