so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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