dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
too bad you live with your parents still
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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