I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
