I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
