dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
