Who did Billy Mays play for?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I believe in your delicious
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
