i don't like sucking hair
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I'm getting married
To pizza
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
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