dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Screwed.edu
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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