so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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