dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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