That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
