Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
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the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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