Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Randomize
