Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
