I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize