I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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