I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
