Dual....:-)
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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