If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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