Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize